Dustin Pedroia on Tomas Kaberle

Hey. Long time no see. Deal with it. Me first, you second. Lets talk hockey since nobody gives a shit about the game I'm playing in tonight, including me.

This Kaberle guy. I don't know what set him off on his quest to prove there can be a more useless Boston sports player in history than Duane Starks but dude alright you convinced us you can stop now

Dustin Pedroia on Daisuke

Look, dude. You're supposed to actually not be a laughing stock, we've been over this. LACKEY is the one we got to have somebody that gets shelled every start and give Wakefield work.

Sox Yankees

What a great team to face when 0-6. Hey, the umpire got through four whole pitches before fucking up a call, so who knows.

Gonna drop one to the Indians now. I blame my teammates, shit is ridiculous

Sox Indians 4/5

Big game tonight. For me, I mean. I can see the headlines now. "Pedroia singlehandedly earns Sox first win of season, kills annoying drum banging shithead with home run"

Hey, Theo, nice job on this Lackey guy. And you told me I was stupid when I said we should fill that spot in the rotation with JeMarcus Russell because it'd be funny.

What a terrible call, I tagged that little turd way before he got on the bag. Ah, shit, I think Tito just saw me using my smartphone on the field

Alright. Well, Bard just got pulled for Wakefield. So, I don't want to be crude, but I think it is fair to say "he fucking pitched like shit and just cost me a fucking victory."

Thattaboy Lester. Got through a whole pitch this season without giving up a home run. Looks like I'm gonna have to bail your ass out..... again

1st Inning Dugout Update

Out on a deep fly, advanced Jacoby. Probably would have hit it out but I was still laughing about that miscue in center field, Texas sucks

Sox Rangers, April 1st

4:05 first pitch, it's about damn time. I probably won't be batting for a while the way this opening day shit tends to go, so tune in at about 4:25 if you don't feel like watching that other pointless crap.